The Final Day

"The beginning of wisdom is in the discovery that there exists contradictions of permanent tension with which it is necessary to live and that it is above all not necessary to seek to resolve."

Andre Gorz

Farewell to the Proletariat

Here we find ourselves, on the very last day of 2010.

at the beginning of the year i was joking to everyone that my year would be complete once i'd finished writing my thesis in mid-january.

but then i went and got married in december so the year has turned out to be rather fruitful. in between i spent months preparing for the wedding, working jobs in translation, getting myself in the papers and trying out new things in the kitchen. i reclaimed and renewed some old friendships and cut off a few non-reciprocal ones. i practised honesty with more people and bared my soul to those who matter.

this work-in-progress made some pretty good tread marks this year, i'd say.

together with newfound wisdom upon turning 30, i would like to set the following ideals for 2011:

1. Buy lesser but better

I must train myself to read product labels carefully when i shop. It's not a matter of how much I spend, it's what I am paying for. Let all my bags be real leather and my sweaters be 100% wool instead of acrylic blends. It's probably better that i learn to dress like a real lady as I mature into my 30s. Just because you think you'd probably die without that blouse sitting in your wardrobe doesn't mean that you should compromise by buying it in a size that's not your own. Clothes have to fit right to look right.

2. Care for your eyes, arms and legs

Eye cream for early wrinkles and eye bags. More body lotion for your legs. You moisturized your way through 2010 but you can still do so much better.

3. Exercise

Women who exercise regularly just look better and better as the years go by. That's more than enough incentive to resume yoga and jog more frequently. And lift those dumbbells when you're watching TV!!

4. Don't Think, Just Do

Those half-baked dreams and ambitions brewing in your head? Time to put them into action. That's what exercising your potential really means.

5. Read Better, Know More

No more girlie fiction. Finish reading those academic books you bought off Amazon and devote yourself to books that matter.

6. Translate Your Thesis into English

And get it published somewhere.

7. Work Those Relationships

Stop telling yourself you need to to go OMO because he cannot be trusted/depended on. He needs to own the relationship and be responsible so learn to hand over those reins. You're married now.

出嫁咯！！

It turned out to be the best day of my life.

despite the many hiccups, to me everything was perfect. we ate, drank, danced, sang, laughed and cried. i never knew that so much love could ever exist in one place at one time.

how sweet it is to be loved by so many people. i should be so lucky.

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Preparing the table gifts and favour boxes for the all-important favour cake:

Favour cake boxes with the monogram stickers that i had specially printed:

The final touch - ribbons:

Then finally, ta-daa! My very own handmade 5-tier favour cake!!

Collecting our marriage documents from ROM. Somehow we were both really nervous:

An hour after the wedding - me and his grand foot:

I didnt eat a thing at the reception so it was a relief to finally sit down to a quiet meal with ken:

Him with his ah pek t-shirt and "i'm so gonna drink" pose:

On the way to the wedding after-party (my bro's in the background):

Breakfast the morning after at the Tiffin Room:

Ken wearing my glasses cos he forgot his overnight bag:

Him trying very hard to channel Tony Leung:

The Tiffin Room:

The sumptuous Christmas tree at the hotel lobby:

Checking out:

A Cold Hard Dose of Reality

Of late, many doses in fact.

That aside, I would like to take the opportunity to have with you a little chat about that particular behavioural syndrome popularly termed "boh sim" here in singapore.

"boh sim" is an expression borrowed from the hokkien dialect that typically describes a state of "having no consideration for others" or "not having the interests of a particular someone at heart". put simply, the term conveys succinctly the subject's state of disappointment or heartbreak at a third person's lack of sensitivity or consideration for said subject and/or specific situation.

last night, i was made the victim of an acute case of boh sim-ness.

the sms informed that she was skipping the wedding because she was going on holiday with her husband from the 17th to the 26th of december. and oh, sorry for telling you so late but we can try to meet up before or after the wedding?

i was livid.

for the benefit of my readers , let us go through the reasons why i felt unimportant, looked-over and abandoned by the news.

1. she chose a holiday with her husband over my wedding.

2. she failed to rsvp, despite my mentioning on the invitation that guests should rsvp by 13th november.

3. she only told me ONE WEEK to the wedding, which leaves me about 30 milliseconds to call the hotel manager, revise the guest turnout and remove her name from the seating list.

4. she didnt bother to tell me earlier despite the fact that holidays have to be booked WAAAY in advance during a peak travelling period like the month of december.

5. couldn't she have postponed her departure by a day?

6. all i got was a measly sms. if you have to break my heart, at least have the guts to do it over the phone.

granted that we're not fantastically close friends. granted that we havent been contacting each other very often. still, i thought her attendance was a given. that she probably thought it was unnecessary to rsvp since she would definitely be at the wedding come hailstone or tornado.

maybe i am over-equating things here, but sometimes friendships are really worth crap.